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Sunday Gratitude – 5.IV.2026

To those celebrating today – Christ is Risen! – Happy Easter!
And then there are the “weird” ones here who are still waiting another week, among which I count myself. There have been a lot of services already – yesterday, I think I was in church for nearly four hours. I’ve really struggled this Lent; from the beginning, I felt less ready for it than most years and this year… wow. For the greater part of Lent, I believed that the Orthodox were also going to be celebrating Pascha today, and it was only looking at the calendar more carefully a couple of weeks ago when I realized that no, there’s a one-week difference. I don’t know. I wasn’t expecting to spend so much time in church this weekend, but I was at vigil last night, and I certainly had the feeling of moving from the darkness into the light, and by the time the service was over, there was an air of hopefulness and joy there. For that I am grateful. (My brain did fight against this on the way home, though. *sigh*)
I am grateful for the more spring-like weather, and the opportunity to be outside. I’m also grateful for my neighbor who invites me to come walking with her.
I am grateful for friends who take the time to talk even in the rain.
I am grateful for making it home in a storm the other day; I wasn’t expecting it, then all of a sudden, I was driving down this country highway with lightning flashes all around. I don’t think that they were very close, as there was only a tiny bit of thunder, but what a show! The next day, driving down those same roads, I could actually see how high the water is, and I’m grateful that there were no issues with low-lying stretches of road or the bridges.

Time to take the Christmas wreath down! I am thankful to have had a little bit of time to be outside with my kids, and I’m thankful that they have places around that they can enjoy riding their bikes through, and that they’ve been fine with this “exploring”.
I am thankful for the joy of singing.
I am thankful for the things that are showing signs of life (and even blooming) even after a very cold winter and long periods of neglect.
I am grateful for the opportunity to have been in contact with a number of people on this day, in the joy of Easter.
I am grateful for yet another sign that I’m not alone through the hard stuff.
Thank you so much for being here! Christ is Risen!

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Sunday Gratitude – 29.III.2026

I really hate it when it seems like I blink and yet another week has passed. Somehow so much of this time ends up feeling like a blur, and it seems like all that is left is a growing list of things that should have been done long ago, but haven’t been done yet.
In the meantime, though, I’ve been trying not to lose a sense of gratitude, and to also try to make the most of the days at hand. We’ve had a couple of days that have hit 70F, which has been amazing, and especially as the days are getting longer, it would be terrible if we didn’t do something to take advantage of the warmer weather. My younger son had a day off of school a couple of weeks back, and the two of us went out on our bikes and rode ten miles together, and it was amazing. He also started taking pictures with my camera that afternoon, so I’ll be sharing a few of those in this post.

A couple of weeks after the real birthday, my youngest, in kindergarten, had her first real birthday party. It was a bowling alley affair, and, per the terms of the contract, was less than two hours long, but for a group of 5 and 6 year olds, it was fine. I was completely stressed out over this for at least a week for a number of reasons, but it turned out really, really good. Even the weather held out, kind of… It started raining about the time that the party started, and it was still raining as people left. Had we started a couple of hours later, everybody would have been going home in sleet, because we had a blizzard come through the next day. The kids were thrilled to get the day off of school, and despite the crazy wind, we never lost power. The next day, our dear neighbor made a path for our car using a snowblower.
I’m grateful that even though I managed to break a spoke on the one bike (a different one than before), this happened in a place where I could ride to a place where I could leave the bike for a couple of days, and which was very close to the bike shop. On the night that this happened, I was also able to get a ride back home with one of the ladies from church. I’d never talked to her before, and she’s incredibly sweet, and lives just a couple of streets over from where I live.
I’m grateful for the amazing time I had at St. Haralambos in Niles a couple of weeks back. Not only were some very dear “real life” friends there, I finally got to meet Fr. Andrew Damick in person. We have been online acquaintances (friends) for over 20 years, and it seemed like high time to meet him in person. He actually recognized me by sight as well, which is crazy because it’s been a looong time since I posted any photos of myself that he might come across. 🙂 That was a lot of fun, though.

Breezy days and kites! I am grateful, as well, for the opportunity to visit an old friend and just enjoy sitting on the front step, having a conversation in the sunshine.
In many ways, I feel pulled very, very, very thin. There have been a lot of good things, to be sure, but there have been a number of very, very frustrating things as well. I don’t know; at this point, I’m not sure that I’ll ever have things “figured out”, but there’s a path to go forward on, and that’s the way through this all. Forgive me again for the blog silence – I truly am grateful for you.

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Journeying toward the Good

The Stand was the first book by Stephen King I read, and probably still my favorite. I was fourteen at the time, and though my mom was somewhat nervous of King’s reputation as a horror author, I had thoroughly outgrown the children’s section, and I was in desperate need of finding adult books that I liked. Many of my friends were into science-fiction and fantasy, and though I dabbled with that, I never got deeply into it. There were classics, but I didn’t know at all how to approach that.
When King’s unabridged version of The Stand came out, it sat on the endcap of the Waldenbooks and piqued my interest. Truly, it’s less of a horror novel than it is more of a dystopian epic. My mom’s philosophy generally seemed to be that I read so much that as long as a book wasn’t truly inappropriate, she’d probably buy it for me because she trusted that I could process what I was reading with everything else.
I devoured The Stand. At its core, it’s very much a good versus evil story, where a cataclysmic event happens, everyone is forced to take sides, and good and evil battle it out. In a sense, that’s one of the oldest plot lines ever, but it’s timeless because it’s a story that can be told a million different ways.
There was a subplot where, being intentionally vague here, the good guys send spies over to the city of the bad guys. There’s a woman named Dana who becomes one of these spies. On paper, she’d seem like the type of person who would be drawn to the bad guys and if I remember correctly, there’s a little nervousness that she might defect. She remains true to her calling to the good, though, but as she is living in the city of the bad guys, she can’t help but be surprised at how much she really and truly likes many of the people living there. Under normal circumstances, these people would be neighbors and coworkers and friends, and there would be no quarrel with any of them. Yet she knew that if the good were to prevail, these people would have to convert or die, because as much as they were “nice” people, they had chosen to follow an evil master.
For me, Dana’s surprise here was a profound realization for me. It drove home the fact that there are plenty of people out there who default to evil because they refuse to follow the good. They are still “nice enough” and carry out lives of respectability, order, and even perhaps “goodness”, but when actually called to the hard path of following the good, they take a pass on it. After all, what’s the use of voluntary hardship and sacrifice if this life is all we’ve got?
It drove home, as well, that much of that which is evil is wrapped in shiny clothes. Satan may be the prince of darkness, but he’s also Lucifer, who is associated with the light, particularly with the dawn. Light and dawn are beautiful and hopeful things, but in the fallen angel, they are false and they hide the true nature of what he is.
I’ve been hearing that it’s a “thing” right now for people to post themselves going through Osama bin Laden’s “Letter to America” and letting themselves be won over by how much they find that they actually agree with him. What is sad is that they don’t seem to realize that the best liars don’t lie all the time; they lie just enough to keep others believing no matter what they say. If someone lies half the time, that person is obviously unreliable. If a person is truthful more than 90% of the time, there’s a lot more leeway given in believing the person is correct, or that if he is wrong, he’s just mistaken, rather than trying to intentionally mislead. That’s only considering factual inaccuracies; there are plenty of different ways to lie, and there are ways to lie, like telling people what they want to hear, where the people hearing those lies eat up every word and beg for more.
For this reason, I don’t think any of us should be surprised when we read the thoughts of some truly despicable people and find that we share many similar ideas. Over at David Burge/Iowahawk’s Twitter (X), he makes this point succinctly:
And, for good measure, the follow-up (forgive the language, please):
If people cannot realize or refuse to recognize that evil doesn’t usually advertise itself as the “fire and brimstone” caricature of itself, it’s a danger. At a fundamental level, we know this. It’s the reason children are warned of strangers offering candy. It’s why Delores Umbridge is arguably the scariest villain in all of the Harry Potter books. Why, oh, why, then, does it surprise so many that the people who have probably come closest to “pure evil” in history are not merely raving lunatics and that these people had reasons people were listening and following them? Why then, can they not seem to discern that even though a lot of these people had valid points on many issues, they still did evil things and led others to do evil, and that is not to be overlooked? I’m sure all of them would justify what they did. However, even though the choice between following the good and seeking justification is sometimes a fine line, justification is always going to be the inferior goal.
I guess it’s all just a reminder that what each one of us is tasked in doing is training our own hearts to follow the good, come what may. Each one of us has our own journey, our own struggles, and our own joys. Seeking the Good can unite us in purpose, but we don’t have the insight into other’s hearts the way we do our own. Even people who look like they have it all together, who look like their lives are all sorted out and not messy haven’t necessarily made the best choices in life either, and so envy of them is a sad waste of time.
There are so many pieces of this that are related but are slightly different that I’m having some trouble pinning down exactly how I want to close here, but the largest point remains that we shouldn’t be surprised when we see similarities in ourselves with people who do evil things; not only are they not all that different from us, they’re part of us as well. On the flip side, each one of us has the individual decision to follow what is good, and that is governed by a constant training of the heart. That training comes through experience and discernment, but that process begins really early. I’m sure my mom never expected that something out of a Stephen King book would be that memorable or meaningful to her 14-year-old daughter, but these lessons are all around, if we’re willing to pay attention.

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Sunday Gratitude – 12.XI.2023

What a crazy week! I suppose the first thing that I’m grateful for is that I’ve made it to the end. As far as I know, I didn’t miss any appointments.
I’m grateful to be starting with physical therapy. Thankfully, it seems like there’s nothing physically wrong with my feet; it’s just muscles that are contracted way past where they should be. It’s going to mean continuing on with all of this as a matter of habit, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
I’m grateful for the seasonable weather, the sunshine, and that I got to go with the little girls to the park on Saturday. The park we went to is right on Lake Michigan, and it’s a truly beautiful spot. Much of the coastline in this area is made up of bluffs, from the tiny to pretty impressively large. There’s a fair amount of concern about the bluffs collapsing, but I don’t know that there’s anything that can be done. The people who built the old houses along the lake – the ones that are probably 100 years old – built them far enough back to account for the bluffs eventually falling. Houses that are more recent – say the 60s on – wanted more of the lake view, and many houses are now in danger or have had to be removed.

It only looks as though the water comes to the wall – the bluff there is probably 80 feet, even if the vertical “fall” isn’t visible here I am grateful for that little voice that giggles at songs about tacos and which says, every once in awhile, “You’re the best, mommy”. Oh, how I’ll miss it when it’s gone.
I’m grateful for long telephone conversations with friends, and the “bearing of each other’s burdens” that happens through that.
I’m grateful that I didn’t have to get out of my pajamas on Friday! I’m grateful that I got to sit with the little kids and put on videos about music on Youtube.
I’m thankful for silliness on Instagram. 🙂
I’m thankful that even though I tend to sometimes not water my plants quite as regularly as I should, most of them are still alive, and I am grateful for the beauty of the sun shining in on them, despite what a mess the place is!

I’m grateful to witness the magic an old cattail has for a six-year-old; open it up and the insides float away like clouds of fairy dust.
I’m grateful that even my nine-year-old still will curl up on my lap and fall asleep if he isn’t feeling great.
In any case, I ought to finish up here so I can get a little sleep, as the whole weekday routine starts over in just a few hours
I am thankful for you.

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Saturday on Substack – 11.XI.2023

The time shift feels like we’re in more natural time, but boy, are the sunsets early! I’m finally getting this posted after a very, very busy week. Come check out the post here: https://open.substack.com/pub/breathofhallelujah/p/saturday-on-substack-11xi2023


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Weaponized AI. Merely Paranoia?

Last Saturday, I needed some happy music as I was trying to do things around the house, and I ended up with a bunch of German pop songs. One of the songs on that list was a song called “Dusche” (“Shower”, as in “bathroom shower”) by Farin Urlaub, who is very successful both as a solo artist and as a member of the group Die Ärzte.
Mind you, the video may not be for everybody, but I include it here because the video makes it pretty clear what’s being sung about and the translation is pretty decent. The whole story of the song is that this man finds himself fighting against his household items, as they have started a revolt and seem to be planning to assassinate him. He, in turn, becomes more unhinged as he fights against him. The place where the shower comes in is in the chorus, where he sings “And I’m sleeping in the shower, ’cause the shower sticks with me, it’s the only friend I have left in the entire world” and describes it as the only thing he can trust because it’s remained normal.
Although it’s a hard rock track, and the video is even a *little* gruesome at the end of the video (kind of depends on one’s definition), I find the song hilarious. The premise is so ludicrous in the first place, and the overreaction of the protagonist is crazy. One assumes that the man singing is paranoid, but there’s just enough of the thread of reality holding him in that he can get words like “Haushaltsgegenstände” (household items) into the song.
(The song even has an English Wikipedia article, which can be found here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dusche)
The thing is, when I was listening to it on Saturday, a truly disturbing thought came to mind. The song came out in 2005, which was when I was still living in Germany. Yes, at that time, there were good computers, there were iPods, there were even cell phones – though my Siemens M35 had a text memory of 10 messages!
Not to sound paranoid myself, because I do enjoy a lot of technology, but what we’re seeing in Artificial Intelligence these days actually makes the scenario of what happens in “Dusche” a lot more possible. I can’t imagine wanting “smart” items in my house already; for whatever advantages that they are supposed to give us, the disadvantages when they don’t work correctly seem to be more catastrophic than when normal things stop working… Maybe it’s just me.
Sure, the idea of technology turned against us has been around for a long, long time, it’s a common theme even in early science fiction. However, the idea that one’s toaster could be used to attack somebody through artificial intelligence is the stuff nightmares are made of. Somehow, though, the more people bring this stuff into their homes, the more these crazy things are likely to come true at some scale. “Lockdown” or “house arrest” could come to have new meaning. Again, I don’t mean to be paranoid, but already cars come with their information and entertainment packages, and where and how that is all being used is being transmitted to others. As a passive thing, most people are probably fine with it – the people who objected back in the day were few – but it doesn’t take all that much imagination that there would be methods to weaponize that at some point, at least in theory.
Seriously, I don’t think that weaponized AI is going to look like the video of “Dusche”. However, I think it is reasonable to be wary of going all-in with the “smart” homes and adoption of AI just for the sake of its adoption.

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Lilla Rose Fab Friday #2

For the latest Lilla Rose posts, please check out the following:
The author of this blog is a “Flexi Rep/Affiliate” with Lilla Rose, and is not employed by Lilla Rose. Purchases made through this link <https://www.lillarose.com/katja> will earn the author a commission.
I’m a little late here in not posting before the Facebook “event” for Lilla Rose Fab Fridays, but at the very least, I can post that the discount for today and tomorrow is 35% sitewide, which is very, very good!

(Every Friday at 11am Pacific, the discount wheel at the Lilla Rose Facebook Page will be spun and a discount of that amount will be applied to orders made that Friday or Saturday. For those who join in live, there’s a chance to win a new release item. )
To order, make sure to click through with my link; every little bit helps.
https://www.lillarose.com/katja

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Sunday Gratitude – 5.XI.2023

Dear Lord, I am grateful to have made it through another week. It was certainly a week which wore me out, nothing got done easily, and there’s still a good bit more coming up this week.
Still, there are important things to be grateful for. I am grateful that I got to see the specialist I needed without having to wait a long time; I am grateful that I can start physical therapy tomorrow. Physical therapy seems to work most of the time with this, so I am thankful that there looks like the road to healing may be starting.

I am grateful to have had the opportunity to talk to a couple of friends over the phone. Especially on Thursday, I was feeling quite down, and being able to talk about things – even random silly things – is such a help.
I’m thankful that despite the snow, we ended up with some decent weather, and despite all the other issues, I was able to cut the grass. It may be the last time I need to mow this year, but by having the leaves mulched in, there should be much less of a mess come spring. Besides this, I didn’t manage to finish the back a couple weeks ago, and looking out the back windows, it was kind of ugly.
I’m extremely grateful that the solution to going to Confession seems to be working fairly well. I’m grateful to the priest, who has been incredibly kind to me in the midst of so many of my difficulties.
I am grateful for old friends for whom gaps in time are not reasons for the friendship to fall apart.
I am grateful for the teachers my kids have, especially the two younger ones. It’s made a lot of difference as far as their attitudes toward school but I think even beyond. I’m grateful to the staff and volunteers who have just been very nice and very understanding, even when I end up at the school multiple times in the same day.
As much as I miss the kids, I am grateful for a little time to be able to rest, to not be interrupted 30 times in trying to put a thought together in my head, to not feel like I should be doing five things at once, to the point where I feel like I hardly know what I’m doing anymore.
I am thankful to witness beautiful things with the kids, holding them close, artwork, three-year-old “thank-yous”, etc.
As always, I am very thankful to you who read this. Have a great week!

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Saturday on Substack – 4.XI.2023

The rain didn’t exactly wash away the wild and windy Halloween that we had here, but the snow on the ground was pretty in the morning. Come check out my Saturday Substack post over here! https://open.substack.com/pub/breathofhallelujah/p/saturday-on-substack-4xi2023


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No Bravery

This Twitter (X) post came to my attention today
This pastor, Josh Buice, and his wife decided to visit St. Peter’s Basilica in Rome on Reformation Day, wearing Martin Luther T-Shirts and take pictures of themselves doing that there. How stunningly clever! How brave! I’m not Roman Catholic, nor have I ever been, but this couple embarrasses me as an American because they reinforce all sorts of stereotypes about clueless and rude Americans in Europe. However, Andrew Isker, a fellow Protestant, takes them to task as well here: (full tweet text below)
It is remarkable just how immature these guys are. The “immaturity” I am talking about is not “making memes.” It is well known how Luther and the reformers used the 16th Century version of the internet (the printing press) to poast [sp]. I am not talking about that.
But rather the immaturity of not knowing what time it is, and pretending like re-fighting the battles that were pressing in the 16th Century is both extremely edgy and a worthwhile pursuit as our enemies are actively destroying every last remnant of Christendom.
I don’t fight with other Christians over doctrine, even ones I consider to be in very, very serious error unless that doctrine is relevant to the battles we are currently fighting. I don’t fight baptists over baptism. I don’t fight orthos over icons. I don’t fight Catholics over soteriology and the papacy. This is not because I don’t think these things are extremely important doctrinal concerns. They are.
There are not, however, where the battle facing the church is at this moment. It is not the 16th and 17th Century anymore. Anyone with any awareness of the world we live in knows you are infinitely more likely to go to prison for opposing the regime than the Papacy—a regime that murders countless babies, mutilates the genitals of children, sends hundreds of thousands to die in pointless wars, and robs everyone of both their wealth and their historic way of life.
To engage in such pointless trolling, to edgelord in the safety of battles fought by much more courageous men centuries ago is to demonstrate profound immaturity. A childishness that plays silly games as our entire civilization burns to the ground.
-Andrew IskerIsker is spot-on here, especially in talking about the internet trolling and how safe it was for the two of them to do this. What was the worst that was going to happen? Somebody telling them they had to leave because their clothing wasn’t appropriate? Big deal! Apparently, that didn’t happen, because had it, they probably would have posted about that as well.
This reminds me of a story from years back, either in 2006 or 2007. I had already moved back to the US, but I was visiting a dear friend in Germany, and he had taken me to Eichstätt, where there is a major Catholic university. Outside of town, he drove me to a little Turkish restaurant where, he said, the food was more authentically Turkish than most döner stands in Germany.

Not the same cross, but I’ve misplaced the one from the story Once the man standing at the counter looked at us, I was filled with fear. He wasn’t mean or nasty, but my blood ran cold as he saw the three-bar-cross hanging from my neck. I have never had something anything like that happen before or after. We ordered our food, and sat down in the small dining area to the right of the front counter and acted as normally as possible.
A very clear thought came to my mind, “If you know what is good for you, you will NOT cross yourself before you eat.” Whether it was the voice of fear itself, or whether there was some other reason that came to my mind, I don’t know. I just had the strange feeling as though I would be risking my life to show any more outward sign of being Christian. Part of me felt as though I was falling into nonsense, and I fought the feeling back. When we had our food, I paused for a moment, crossed myself and quietly prayed, “Lord, Jesus Christ, bless the food and drink of these your servants, for you are ever gracious, holy, blessed, and love mankind, Amen.” All in all, what, ten seconds?
My friend and I ate our food. We weren’t exactly in a rush, but we didn’t dawdle, and we left immediately after we had finished. We exited the restaurant, and before we got to the car, my friend – who is extremely gentle and had probably seen me pray before a meal hundreds of times before – turned to me and chastised me, saying, “Why did you have to cross yourself like that? You could have gotten both of us killed!”
The strange situation had gotten even stranger; I had said nothing to him about the weird sense I had gotten in the restaurant, particularly not that I felt that I was in danger. My response was, “And if he killed me, that’s on him, not me, isn’t it?”
(I almost wanted to apologize for the fact that he probably would have been killed with me, as I had actually thought of that, but I didn’t.)
The momentary flash of anger dissipated. Although my friend knew that I took being an Orthodox Christian seriously, I believe this was the first time he realized that I’d actually be willing to die for my faith. He understood that I hadn’t just done something foolish because I didn’t know better. I sensed awe mixed with tenderness in him as he answered, “I guess you’re right.” He wasn’t even angry that he probably would have suffered for my “sin” as well.

Random Eichstätt I don’t know what in the world happened that day, whether the man or the place had some sort of evil attached to them, or the two of us were suffering separate but shared delusions. I just know that I did not feel safe there, showing the outward expression of Christianity, and neither did my friend.
I’m not saying the pastor above isn’t a brave person; I don’t know him or his story, so I can’t speculate. However, there wasn’t an ounce of courage required to pull off this stunt. There was more courage standing up to whatever malevolent force was in that restaurant. There’s more courage with Jewish students in the US (much less Europe) wearing things that identify them as such. There’s more courage in the sixth-grader I know who refused to bow to the whims of his school administration by refusing to “admit” that there are more than two genders. Maybe the pastor just meant to be funny, but then he ought to have been clear about that (and maybe not worn shorts).

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Lilla Rose November 2023 Update

For the latest Lilla Rose posts, please check out the following:
The author of this blog is a “Flexi Rep/Affiliate” with Lilla Rose, and is not employed by Lilla Rose. Purchases made through this link <https://www.lillarose.com/katja> will earn the author a commission.
With Christmas coming up, there’s a lot of stuff going on with Lilla Rose here in November, so let’s get started!
First off, the “Mane Event”

Yes, it’s the 3rd, but for once, I’m not late! The “Mane Event” set will be 20% off from today until the 5th in conjunction with the return of Lilla Rose’s November “Fab Fridays”.

Every Friday at 11am Pacific, the discount wheel at the Lilla Rose Facebook Page will be spun and a discount of that amount will be applied to orders made that Friday or Saturday. For those who join in live, there’s a chance to win a new release item.
As mentioned in the above graphic, the promotion this month is free shipping with orders of $60 or more.

Not only that, but there are some interesting new releases:

The necklace chain looks like it could be finicky or quite pretty if done right.
I haven’t done a whole lot with my hair in the last month; I’ve actually been wearing it down more than I have in a long time. I did have one event that I did my hair up for, though I lacked the bobby pin or two to keep the little braid ends tucked up where I wanted them to stay.
I haven’t tried the sport minis yet; I’ll probably order a couple things in time for Christmas, and I’ll probably add a couple in there. I’ll let you know how that works out.
Stocking stuffers:

Also, save on sets:

There’s also a bundle offer for anyone who might want to get into selling Lilla Rose. (Not a requirement for enrolling!)

Take care! 🙂
To order, make sure to click through with my link; every little bit helps.
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Wordless Wednesday #49 – Pumpkins (no spice)






If you enjoy my posts, please consider:
- Giving this post a “like”
- Sharing this post
- Subscribing to the blog
- Pledging monetary support
- Subscribing to my YouTube or Anchor.fm channels
- Patronizing the links that support this blog: Lilla Rose | Amazon
Thank you very much!