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Sunday Gratitude – 5.IV.2026

To those celebrating today – Christ is Risen! – Happy Easter!
And then there are the “weird” ones here who are still waiting another week, among which I count myself. There have been a lot of services already – yesterday, I think I was in church for nearly four hours. I’ve really struggled this Lent; from the beginning, I felt less ready for it than most years and this year… wow. For the greater part of Lent, I believed that the Orthodox were also going to be celebrating Pascha today, and it was only looking at the calendar more carefully a couple of weeks ago when I realized that no, there’s a one-week difference. I don’t know. I wasn’t expecting to spend so much time in church this weekend, but I was at vigil last night, and I certainly had the feeling of moving from the darkness into the light, and by the time the service was over, there was an air of hopefulness and joy there. For that I am grateful. (My brain did fight against this on the way home, though. *sigh*)
I am grateful for the more spring-like weather, and the opportunity to be outside. I’m also grateful for my neighbor who invites me to come walking with her.
I am grateful for friends who take the time to talk even in the rain.
I am grateful for making it home in a storm the other day; I wasn’t expecting it, then all of a sudden, I was driving down this country highway with lightning flashes all around. I don’t think that they were very close, as there was only a tiny bit of thunder, but what a show! The next day, driving down those same roads, I could actually see how high the water is, and I’m grateful that there were no issues with low-lying stretches of road or the bridges.

Time to take the Christmas wreath down! I am thankful to have had a little bit of time to be outside with my kids, and I’m thankful that they have places around that they can enjoy riding their bikes through, and that they’ve been fine with this “exploring”.
I am thankful for the joy of singing.
I am thankful for the things that are showing signs of life (and even blooming) even after a very cold winter and long periods of neglect.
I am grateful for the opportunity to have been in contact with a number of people on this day, in the joy of Easter.
I am grateful for yet another sign that I’m not alone through the hard stuff.
Thank you so much for being here! Christ is Risen!

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Sunday Gratitude – 29.III.2026

I really hate it when it seems like I blink and yet another week has passed. Somehow so much of this time ends up feeling like a blur, and it seems like all that is left is a growing list of things that should have been done long ago, but haven’t been done yet.
In the meantime, though, I’ve been trying not to lose a sense of gratitude, and to also try to make the most of the days at hand. We’ve had a couple of days that have hit 70F, which has been amazing, and especially as the days are getting longer, it would be terrible if we didn’t do something to take advantage of the warmer weather. My younger son had a day off of school a couple of weeks back, and the two of us went out on our bikes and rode ten miles together, and it was amazing. He also started taking pictures with my camera that afternoon, so I’ll be sharing a few of those in this post.

A couple of weeks after the real birthday, my youngest, in kindergarten, had her first real birthday party. It was a bowling alley affair, and, per the terms of the contract, was less than two hours long, but for a group of 5 and 6 year olds, it was fine. I was completely stressed out over this for at least a week for a number of reasons, but it turned out really, really good. Even the weather held out, kind of… It started raining about the time that the party started, and it was still raining as people left. Had we started a couple of hours later, everybody would have been going home in sleet, because we had a blizzard come through the next day. The kids were thrilled to get the day off of school, and despite the crazy wind, we never lost power. The next day, our dear neighbor made a path for our car using a snowblower.
I’m grateful that even though I managed to break a spoke on the one bike (a different one than before), this happened in a place where I could ride to a place where I could leave the bike for a couple of days, and which was very close to the bike shop. On the night that this happened, I was also able to get a ride back home with one of the ladies from church. I’d never talked to her before, and she’s incredibly sweet, and lives just a couple of streets over from where I live.
I’m grateful for the amazing time I had at St. Haralambos in Niles a couple of weeks back. Not only were some very dear “real life” friends there, I finally got to meet Fr. Andrew Damick in person. We have been online acquaintances (friends) for over 20 years, and it seemed like high time to meet him in person. He actually recognized me by sight as well, which is crazy because it’s been a looong time since I posted any photos of myself that he might come across. 🙂 That was a lot of fun, though.

Breezy days and kites! I am grateful, as well, for the opportunity to visit an old friend and just enjoy sitting on the front step, having a conversation in the sunshine.
In many ways, I feel pulled very, very, very thin. There have been a lot of good things, to be sure, but there have been a number of very, very frustrating things as well. I don’t know; at this point, I’m not sure that I’ll ever have things “figured out”, but there’s a path to go forward on, and that’s the way through this all. Forgive me again for the blog silence – I truly am grateful for you.

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Remembering Bryeon Hunter, ten years later

The little boy in the Amber Alert flyer wasn’t smiling, but even with the pensive look, his bright eyes lit up the face of this handsome little child. I noticed immediately that he was wearing Lightning McQueen pajamas from the movie Cars. The movie had already been out for years, but was still a huge hit with little boys, and my own 21-month-old son was an absolute fanatic.
His mother claimed that he had been kidnapped when “three Hispanic men” who kidnapped her and the child, but then only let her go. She claimed that the men had given her trouble before, and that they wanted to intimidate her to leave her home in Maywood, Illinois (a suburb of Chicago) because her family is black.

The thing is, it was all a lie. Bryeon’s mother randomly picked out men from booking photos to accuse of beating her and kidnapping the pair. The problem is, these were real people, and it took less than a day to clear all three due to the fact that one was in jail at the time, one turned himself in right away to clear his name, and the other was also easily cleared.
Then the truth started to dribble out. The boy was not, in fact, kidnapped. He had been beaten and left for dead after his mother and her boyfriend were frustrated and upset with his lack of progress being potty-trained. After being beaten, he lay on the floor for hours, struggling for life, but no one helped him, and he died there. After he died, the two adults put his body in a backpack and dumped his body from a bridge into the nearby Des Plaines river. They “cleaned up” the scene and coached Bryeon’s 4-year-old brother with the story that they were going to tell police.
It’s actually amazing how quickly the story fell apart. Had Bryeon been kidnapped, that speed may have saved his life. However, in this case, the child was dead to begin with.
The Maywood police had trouble finding Bryeon’s body and eventually gave up. A local man by the name of Robert Larson spent most of the next month looking for him, finally finding the body on May 14. Not that race should have anything to do with it, but Larson is white, and it didn’t matter to him that this was a black child he was looking for, just that this was a dear child who had his life cut short way too early, and maybe he could do something for the dignity of this child in death, even if he couldn’t do so in life. Larson certainly was going through some hard times himself, but over the next five years, he also made sure that he made it to every court hearing to stand up for Bryeon.
Now ten years have passed. Had he lived, Bryeon would be eleven, like my son is. He wouldn’t be so little anymore. There would be plenty of disagreements and fights along the way, but I can’t imagine doing anything so incredibly brutal and inhumane to a little boy like that, one’s own son or not. My son’s second birthday rolled around a couple of weeks before Bryeon’s would have. My son got to celebrate his, but Bryeon will always only have had that one birthday to celebrate. It’s so unbelievably sad.
Ten years later, there’s not a word of remembrance to be found anywhere else on the internet. With all that has happened with “Black Lives Matter” and the like, it’s striking that there seems to be so little attention given to cases where, even when the innocent child is black, the murderers are black as well. That the mother here tried to make herself out to be the victim of racism and blamed real people solely on their Hispanic appearance also seems to get lost in the mix, but she did it to garner sympathy and, to some degree, it worked. Truly, Larson – supposedly of a “privileged caste” – showed more love to her son in death than she did in life.
It’s been ten years, so these things are hard to find now, but I seem to remember some of the usual players going on about how difficult it is for black women and raising kids. Raising kids is incredibly hard, whether one is black, white, green, purple, or blue. It’s hard rich or poor. (Of course, being able to afford multiple nannies would probably help, but how many among us have that luxury?) Having a 4-year-old and 1-year-old at age 22 without the father(s) of the children around is excruciatingly hard. I don’t deny that. But that’s not racism, that’s the way the world has always been.
I don’t write to make this a racial story, though. I write it to remember a little boy whose short life did matter and still does.
Bryeon Christian Hunter – 9 July 2011-16 April 2013
Memory eternal!

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Spring of Cary: An Affair to Remember


Lisa over at Boondock Ramblings nudged me a bit to join in with the “Spring of Cary” since the Christmas movie reviews (‘Tis the Season Cinema) last year ended up being so fun. I don’t know that I can do all of these, but we’ll see. I don’t know that before this morning I’d ever seen a Cary Grant movie in my life, so it’s interesting for me to see what I’ve “missed”.
I checked the online availability of An Affair to Remember, and apart from trying to find pieces on YouTube or the like, I couldn’t find it for free. I then remembered that I’ve got a local library, and that they might have it, and fortuitously enough, they had this movie, and next week’s film, Holiday.
(I hadn’t been to my local library in years. To put it bluntly, it’s awful. It’s the “regional” library for over 100,000 people, and I doubt it has more books than my grandma’s local library, which was for a town with a population well under 10,000. I remember reading several years ago that it has the fewest books per resident of any library “system” in the area. Their motto seems to be “well, if you really want something, you can use your library card in Kenosha too, so we’ll just let you drive down there to get it.” Not only that, but you’ve got to pay for parking anywhere near there!)
In any case, the movie. It’s cliche, isn’t it, to say that they don’t make movies like this anymore. It did drag a little in some places, but it’s not too bad. All the characters have personalities with good and not-so-good things about them. For instance, it’s understandable how Terry might be in a place to love Ken, but then again, it’s understandable how she fell out of that place. Ken’s not an angel, but he’s far from a devil as well, and it’s things like this that keep the twists and turns of the movie believable.
What’s incredibly interesting to me, at least, and which runs with a lot of what I write about here is the depiction of religion in the film. You see, Terry is a Catholic, Nickie’s grandmother is a Catholic, and the assumption is that even if he’s not necessarily practicing, Nickie is as well. There’s no mention of this until Nickie and Terry disembark from the ship, and they have the opportunity to visit Nickie’s grandmother. Nickie’s grandmother is well-to-do, and she lives on a property that has its own private chapel. When Terry hears about this, she asks the grandmother if she may go in to pray. Here we have that:

screenshot (not my work) There she is, praying before Mary, her head covered and everything. (As another aside, the grandmother was wearing all black which was traditional in some places.) The scene is respectful, and when Nickie comes in to join her, the dynamics of her sincerely praying and him seeming kind of lost is something that one doesn’t see on film now. This movie was also made before Vatican II, so these would definitely be a time of the old style, Latin masses in Roman Catholic Churches.
I’m not Catholic, nor have I ever been. However, the scene struck me because it is different from Orthodox practice (we typically don’t have religious statues) but as a former Protestant, I can see how it can be interpreted as she is “worshipping” Mary. In the Catholic and Orthodox Churches, Mary is honored and extolled and venerated, but not worshipped. As with other saints, we ask for her prayers – our intercessions – to God on our behalf. Being as she was mother to Jesus, we understand that her prayers are particularly “heard” by God. If I would have seen this movie before I was Orthodox, though, I wouldn’t have understood that; I’d be pretty perplexed, as I really didn’t know any Catholics with whom I could talk about religion until I was in college. As someone who understands this somewhat better now, it strikes me as quite beautiful, and the assistance Terry finds later in the movie through the Catholic Church makes more sense in this light.
In any case, the story revolves around Nickie and Terry, two “kind-of” single people who find themselves on a voyage back to the US from Europe without their “almost” partners. They find themselves falling for each other, but have to decide if it’s worth giving up certain “perks” of their current lives to follow love with each other. There’s a subtext, here, too, that neither of them are particularly young. Cary Grant (Nickie) was over 50 when this movie was made though looked 40, and Deborah Kerr (Terry) was 36. This isn’t a story of young kids falling in love, but of two individuals who are older and somewhat disillusioned with their prospects, despite how wonderful those prospects appear from the outside.
Oh, boy, and what glamor with all the 1950s styling! The dresses and suits! The cars and furniture and “luxury touches”! Even though I was watching this movie on the 7″ screen of a portable DVD player that is 10 years old, it still was impressive! (That being said, there are a couple of scenes that the fake backgrounds still looked fake on said 7″ screen!)
Were this a Russian movie, the movie would have been about 30 minutes shorter, and would have ended with the car accident and then Nickie would have ended up dead six months later from alcoholism. But it’s an American movie in the era of hope, and so the film doesn’t end that way. It’s been kind of an awful day, stress-wise, and I ended up crying at the end because there is hope there, that even with the broken people that we are, we can get past the Russian endings to something better.
Anyway, I recommend the movie, and I’m glad that Lisa suggested participating. I haven’t read it yet, but her review can be read here: https://lisahoweler.com/2023/04/27/spring-of-cary-an-affair-to-remember/ and Erin’s review at Cracker Crumb Life can be found here: https://crackercrumblife.com/2023/04/27/the-spring-of-cary-grant-an-affair-to-remember/.
Now, I’m off to reading what they wrote!

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Wordless Wednesday #27 – Scenes from the life of the toddler photographer







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Being an Easter People

I first heard of Nadia Bolz-Weber from K.J. Ottinger four-and-a-half years ago with this post, which is amazing: To Be the Chaplain, a quasi-review of Bolz-Weber’s books “Accidental Saints” and “Pastrix“. It’s a post well worth reading, and you should. However, I didn’t keep up on Bolz-Weber because although some of her writings are brilliant, she’s not always my “cup of tea” and I think some of it comes down to the fact that I feel like I’m living the life that she rebelled against.
However, I was doing a search for “saints” on Substack, and I noticed that she has a site over there. I clicked over, and found this, which is brilliant: Resurrection is Messy. It’s an Easter sermon that she gave at a men’s prison. Wow.
I’m not going to recap the piece, because I don’t think that there’s much that I can say that wouldn’t detract from the original. However, one of the lines she uses, describing Christians as an “Easter people” – the depth of that is incredible. Yes, the Christian faith hinges on Christ’s incarnation, death, and Resurrection, and I think those parts have been preached about a lot; they are fundamental to the understanding of Christianity as a faith.
This isn’t exactly the tact that Bolz-Weber’s piece takes, but it’s close enough that I think it is the corollary to what she did write. She speaks about how Christ still bore the scars of crucifixion after His Resurrection, not because God couldn’t have “healed” those as well, but that they serve as a testimony to the pain that suffering Christ went through, but that He overcame that; it’s not where His story ended. It speaks to hope, the hope in Him that does not disappoint, His love for us, and the expectation of “the resurrection from the dead, and the life of the world to come”. Joy, if you will. Even if these times are extremely difficult right now. We are Easter People, and it is the light that we carry even in the darkest times.


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Sunday Gratitude – 23.IV.2023

Christ is Risen!
There’s still a fair sense of Pascha in the air, which I’m grateful for, as it’s been another bear of a week.
I am grateful that we have competent and caring doctors and nurses, and that younger son is finally hearing much better than he has been for a long time.
I’m grateful that my oldest didn’t end up in deeper trouble than she did in regard to an incident at school. I’m grateful to God for giving me a sense of peace in the middle of the situation.
I’m grateful for my children, but I’m also grateful for some time away.
I’m grateful for good friends, and I am grateful that I got to get together with someone who doesn’t live too far, but it’s been a case of not seeing this person in close to a year.
I’m grateful for God’s promises and that in Him we have hope.

As always, I am grateful for each one of you reading, and for your prayers.

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Saturday on Substack

A roundup of miscellaneous things from the past week! Come on over and enjoy!
https://breathofhallelujah.substack.com/p/saturday-on-substack-22iv2023
Hope your week has been good!

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Music in My Head

There’s been lots of Paschal music in my head this week, so much so that I seem to be making up my own tunes sometimes. Here’s one I “caught”.

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Sounds of Pascha

Christ is Risen!
(For a list of languages for the Paschal Greeting, click here: https://orthodoxwiki.org/Paschal_greeting)
In the Orthodox Church, the music is part of the service rather than being just pieces of music chosen to be fitting and pleasing to the congregation. Therefore, these pieces are part of the Pascha service, and there are many different “settings” to each. These are some that are most common in the United States; a lot of them tend to be “Russian”, as it’s more western and more “pleasing to the ear” to people in the West.
Thy Resurrection…
Let God Arise…
The Angel Cried…
Christ is Risen! (Paschal Troparion)
And we sing lots and lots of different versions of “Christ is Risen” in various languages and settings.
“Galician Melody” “Ukrainian Melody” “Appalachian” Serbian, Byzantine, Znamenny settings Greek German Georgian Old Church Slavonic Arabic, Finnish, Georgian And, since we are dealing with different languages here, it ties in nicely with Agape Vespers and the Great Commission. (I mentioned a little bit about this in my last post.) A vespers service is generally about 40 minutes long, but the length of Agape Vespers can vary wildly, depending on how many people will read the Gospel. We attended a church in Chicago where Agape Vespers was probably at least an hour and a half long because there was something like 27 languages represented (one of the men there had formerly been a missionary to Africa and he read the Gospel in at least one language that had clicks in it). However, even in rural northern Idaho, I think we managed over a dozen. I know, I’m a language person, but there’s something incredibly moving about seeing how universal the message of the Gospel is!
Agape Vespers from a church in Oregon just a couple days ago – oddly, without the different languages, but beautiful nonetheless. Lots of “Christ is Risen” versions at the end. Again, Pascha is a great celebration, but it isn’t a single day, and it’s about sharing Christ’s Love to the entire world.

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Pascha at Holy Trinity Cathedral, Chicago

Christ is Risen!
I took the kids to Chicago to celebrate Pascha at Holy Trinity Orthodox Cathedral. This is a special place for me, not in the least because it was the first place I ever really “encountered” Orthodoxy. We went here last year as well, and although we got there at 11pm – 30 minutes before the beginning of nocturnes – the parking lot was full, and there wasn’t a spot to be found anywhere on the street either. This year, we got there at 10:30pm, and there were still plenty of spots, but several more of them filled within minutes of our arrival.

Holy Trinity Cathedral was built in 1902, and was designed by Louis Sullivan, arguably one of the most influential architects in the history of the United States. Holy Trinity is one of only a handful of places of worship that he designed, and if I remember correctly, the only one left standing.

This is the view of the inside of the church immediately inside the doors of thee sanctuary. This even looked a fair amount different than what I am used to, as the carpet that has covered the floors has been removed, going back to the original inlaid wood. It’s beautiful and striking, and also changes the acoustics of the place somewhat. What is surprising i
The church was actually somewhat darker than the photograph, as, at this point, we have not officially hit Pascha. There are actually three services that are part of the celebration of Pascha here: Nocturnes, which start at 11:30pm, with the church mainly dark. That is Fr. Alexander Koranda there, facing the altar.

As it gets closer to midnight, the clergy go behind the iconostasis (the icon “screen” that separates the altar from the rest of the church), and the church gets completely dark. There is silence first, and then there is singing from the clergy behind the iconostasis.

Thy Resurrection, O Christ our Savior, The Angels in Heaven sing, Enable us on earth, To glorify Thee in purity of heart
This is a video of the same point in the service from St. Mary Orthodox Church in Minneapolis from a few years ago:
At the beginning, there is only the light from very few candles, yet in the darkness, they can be seen by all. That flame is shared until everybody in church is holding a lighted candle.

Because this is a church of Russian heritage, the chant is sung in Old Church Slavonic as well.
Everyone (who can) exits the dark church with their candles and processes around the church three times, led by the clergy with the cross and banners, then by the choir, who keeps singing. The bells start to ring.
The bells ringing at midnight on Pascha, 2023 As we walk around outside, it’s obvious that the whole interior is shining bright

After three times around the church, we stand in front of the church, the choir and the clergy sing, and from here we have the first pronouncements of Christ is Risen!
Christ is risen! - Indeed, He is risen! Христосъ воскресе! Воистину воскресе! (Khristos voskrese! Voistinu voskrese!) Χριστὸς ἀνέστη! Ἀληθῶς ἀνέστη! (Khristós anésti! Alithós anésti!) Христос воскрес! Воістину воскрес! (Khrystos voskres! Voistynu voskres!)
We file back into the church, and now everything is light. Tonight the “service” consists of Nocturnes (before midnight) then Matins and Divine Liturgy. Things ran about three hours, all told, though at certain churches, the services can run well into the four and five hour range.
It really starts “feeling” like Pascha with “The Angel Cried”
Archbishop Daniel read the Paschal message of St. John Chrysostom, as is customary
And more cries of “Christ is Risen!”
Christ is risen! - Indeed, He is risen! Христосъ воскресе! Воистину воскресе! (Khristos voskrese! Voistinu voskrese!) Χριστὸς ἀνέστη! Ἀληθῶς ἀνέστη! (Khristós anésti! Alithós anésti!) Христос воскрес! Воістину воскрес! (Khrystos voskres! Voistynu voskres!) ¡Cristo ha resucitado! ¡En verdad ha resucitado! المسيح قام! حقا قام (al-Masīḥ qām! Ḥaqqan qām!) Christus resurrexit! Resurrexit vere! Hristos a înviat! Adevărat a înviat!
Being a language person, I love all the languages, but it’s closely tied in to the Great Commission, making disciples of all nations. Agape Vespers – which take place later on Sunday – is a service where the Gospel is typically read in as many languages as a parish can get together, and is the only service where any parishioner may read the Gospel as part of the church service. (It’s one of my favorite services, but one I haven’t made it to in a long time.)
There is a lot of exhaustion, but there is a sense of overwhelming joy. Being in this place, too, there’s a sense of history as well. From our perch up in the balcony, I could clearly see the big icon of the life of Fr. John Kochuroff, the first priest assigned to this church, who got the church building built, and who went back to Russia in 1907, and was the first priest martyred by the Bolsheviks, on October 31, 1917.

Fr. John Kochuroff in this church in 1905 (public domain) I tried to get an “interesting” point of view on the icon of St. John; it’s still an interesting picture, but the icon is not terribly clear.


(Louis Sullivan makes an appearance in this icon in the middle panel on the left) Being Chicago, there are still people out and about the entire time; it seems somehow strange that they can pass by without any idea of what is taking place inside.

I think Divine Liturgy was finished about 2:30am; afterwards baskets, mainly filled with items of food that ought not to have been consumed during the fast, are blessed, and people sit down and break bread together.

The sweet bread, the butter, red eggs, meats, and for the kids, of course, the sweets! We drove home afterward, which isn’t the easiest thing to do when the ride is over an hour back. Until Ascension, we greet each other with “Christ is Risen!/Indeed He is risen!” to remember that this is a season, not just a day. This week is “Bright Week”, and no regular fasting (Wednesday and Friday) is allowed.
(For anyone interested in seeing a professional “360 degree” site of Holy Trinity, this can be found here: http://digitalchicagohistory.org/exhibits/show/digital-chicago-churches/holy-trinity)

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Sunday Gratitude – Paschal Edition

Christ is Risen!
I don’t know how even to begin here – gratitude doesn’t even begin to describe it. Pascha (Easter) is a reminder of God’s Love for us, and His sacrifice because of that love. It all can tend to be very distant and abstract at times, but especially as we struggle and even suffer, I think there tends to be more and more of a realization of what that means. God is victorious and will be victorious over all this darkness, and His love transcends it all, and I am eternally grateful.
Holy Week was insane and we didn’t manage to make it to any of the services. The week was spent with doctor’s appointments and people in and out of the house. Thursday, the electricity was out for most of the day as well.
I am grateful that these things are getting done. I’m sad that the basement will still need work, but as stupid as that mess was, it revealed something not right with the electric. Although getting the electric issues is expensive, (as if the basement issues weren’t enough), I’m grateful that the electric stuff was found and can be corrected.
I am grateful for the good weather.

I am grateful for good friends and good neighbors. I am grateful for a little bit of time with my oldest.
I am grateful that we got down to Chicago and back without any incidents.
As always, I am grateful for each one of you reading, and for your prayers.

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